Category: DWTS

With over twenty-five years of dancing experience and several championship titles under her belt, Emmy nominated professional dancer Cheryl Burke tangoed and sambaed her way into the hearts of millions through the hit ABC television show, “Dancing with the Stars”, becoming champion twice: with Emmitt Smith in season three and Drew Lachey in season two. In addition, she has starred in NBC’s “I Can Do That” in 2016 and became a coach on Lifetime’s “Dance Moms” in 2017. In 2020, Cheryl teamed with Backstreet Boys superstar and former DWTS partner AJ McLean to host the iHeart Radio produced podcast, “Pretty Messed Up”. This past year Cheryl also delved into the fashion world with her loungewear collection with clothing brand Bailey Blue.

This article is an excerpt from Carrie Ann’s March 10th, 2022 Instagram Live conversation with Cheryl Burke. It has been edited for length and clarity.

How many times have you seen a pseudo “wellness tips” Instagram post that implies that all it takes to achieve self-actualization is to drink more water and do some stretches? One of the major themes of the Carrie Ann Conversations: Journey to Wellness series is that healing and achieving wellness takes work. It requires trial and error, and an ongoing commitment to do things that feed into every aspect of our wellbeing – mind, body, and spirit. Cheryl Burke is someone who exemplifies this commitment and doesn’t shy away from sharing her own struggles. She’s an open book, and her conversation with Carrie Ann shed a refreshing light on just what it takes to come to a place of true wellness. We hope you enjoy!

Carrie Ann: So, this show is about wellness, as you know, and giving people the tools to help with their own wellness journey. I know you’ve been very open about your healing process and your whole wellness routine. When did healing become a focus for you?

Cheryl Burke: I would say when my father passed away. That was right when I was engaged, in 2019. And I’ve always been very fascinated with the brain, our intelligence, and how that all works. I’ve been listening to lots of podcasts lately, like, honestly, I don’t even listen to music anymore. I’m really into these yogis, even though I’m not a yogi. I’m not even close. But I love the spiritual world. I was born Catholic, and even though I’m not necessarily religious now, I do believe in in higher power. I think with my sobriety, it forced me to have to believe in that. As I started surrendering to that, then I really started diving in deep.

Carrie Ann: When you say that, you mean like a higher power?

Cheryl Burke: A higher power, God, whatever you want to call it. It’s hard for me to say God, but I know that there is a higher power, higher presence, universe, angels, whatever you want to say.

Carrie Ann: Yeah, I think that’s the beauty of this higher power. I was raised Christian, and so I speak to God all the time. But I’m a little bit more aligned with maybe more Buddhist philosophies.

Cheryl Burke: Yes, same.

Carrie Ann: Or Shintoism, like I believe that everything has a spirit. That’s probably from my Hawaiian background, because we have a very large Japanese population there. I think you and I are both melting pots. What are your nationalities again?

Cheryl Burke: I did 23 and Me less than a year ago, and I didn’t realize that I’m 53% Ashkenazi Jewish. And the rest is Filipina. My dad thought he was Irish and Russian, but he clearly didn’t have any clue.

Carrie Ann: You and I bonded on the fact that we both that we were Asian and Irish. (Laughing) We were like, and we can drink!

Cheryl Burke: (Laughing)Yes! I was proud. I was like, we don’t get red!

Carrie Ann: We can handle it! Cut to now, where I don’t drink. I wouldn’t say I’m completely sober, that I don’t drink at all. I’ll drink on a very, very special occasion. I’ve learned that as you get older, it just wears and tears on your body and it’s not worth it. But you’re sober. How did that happen? I’ve been fascinated with this.

Cheryl Burke: It happened right after my father passed away. So a lot of big life moments. But it was honestly for a vanity reason. I’ve said this before, but it was like as if my subconscious was rejecting poison. I used to be a proud, I would say, functioning alcoholic. Not like I was wasted, but nothing would affect me. I thought the alcohol was what would help me out of my social anxiety. It got me more comfortable. The only time I never had to drink was before I danced. But then I realized the after effects, right? So the after effects of being hungover, or starting to feel really insecure. And I truly believe that alcohol does that to your brain – it really made my thoughts louder and louder. It made me start questioning and made me feel insecure. I’ll never forget Chad Ochocinco’s season. We did a foxtrot, and my thoughts were so loud, saying “you’re going to forget your own choreography”. And I forgot my choreography! I swayed the wrong way and it threw him off completely. And after that moment, I just ended up drinking more to quiet my thoughts.

Then, right before Matt and I got married, I basically broke out into hives. So I tried everything (to keep drinking), believe me. I was like, let me take a shot of fireball. Let me try vodka. Let me try wine. All in one sitting, full out. And my whole face turned red. So I was like, I cannot do that. When I make a decision, I make a decision. And then I quit cold turkey. And I’m not saying that it is right or wrong, and that this is the way for everybody. Because most of the time it’s not, a lot of people go to rehab. It’s one step at a time.

Carrie Ann: Can I ask, do you go to meetings?

Cheryl Burke: Yes. I haven’t lately, so I’m not going to say that I’m religious about it. But I do have a sponsor that I check in with every week, as well as two therapists, and an online course. You know, I’m very excessive. I’m an addict, I will always be an addict. And that is something that I have to work on daily. It’s a daily practice for me.

Carrie Ann: Changing the direction of your focus towards wellness, which is what I’ve also done, makes your life so much better. Then there’s this whole new world! And what I have realized is it actually takes a lot of effort to really find true wellness.

You just mentioned that you have a really big team, right? And I think that’s what I’ve learned through this process – it definitely takes a team. Even if you can’t afford to get a psychotherapist, there’s apps that you can use and so many tangible, accessible ways to get help. Also reaching out to friends, like having one friend that you confess these things to that understands or is further on the journey. So, what kind of team do you have?

Cheryl Burke: Okay, let me go back to what you were saying. So, absolutely, I hear you. And I think the wellness doesn’t ever stop, because I am always a work in progress. I think for me, when I do the up and down roller coaster ride, it’s the down that really is the most important. It’s like the failure is what creates the success, right? So without feeling like crap, without feeling like oh my god, I just want to quit, and realizing that this is a test from the universe. And it’s a test to yourself to see how resilient you are and how we will survive, right? We are stronger than we think we are. I’ve I realized that it’s one minute at a time sometimes. For me, it’s not even just one day at a time, because sometimes that’s overwhelming. It’s one hour at a time. It’s literally just right now, which focuses me to stay present.

As far as my wellness journey goes, I have a therapist, and I’m such a huge advocate for therapy. I understand that not everybody can afford it. But it is important to also not just go to a friend or a family member, you want to go to someone who’s not biased, right? If you’re ready for it. Therapy has been instilled in my body and in my lifestyle because of the time when I got sexually molested as a little girl. My mom made sure I was in therapy right away. And then it was up to me when I moved here to Los Angeles, when I was 22. It was like season four or five that I was like, uh-oh, I definitely need to go and talk to somebody. That was the start of my partying journey. And for me, I love it because I’m a very curious person. Curiosity makes me want to wake up in the morning, because I just really love learning.

There was a moment on “Dancing with the Stars” where I was like, I don’t think I can continue doing this anymore. Because I didn’t feel like I was learning anything, I just felt like I was on autopilot. And there’s nothing worse for me than feeling like I’m stagnant. At the end of the day, I was just craving to learn something. So when we added the Argentine Tango to the show, I went to Argentina, I learned how to tango, and it fed my soul. And now I’m like that with my brain and my intelligence. Just little things, like learning that we’re not our thoughts. I wish I learned that in grade school. There’s a lot of things that I wish we would have learned in school. But anyway, moving to the present moment. It’s fascinating. Continuous growth is what I just yearn for, and I’m so eager to learn.

Carrie Ann: I wonder if it’s because dancers are always in motion, right? We might be more aware when we are feeling stagnant, because we are really tapped into our kinesthetic awareness.

Cheryl Burke: Oh, 100%. Because we feel that we’re very in tune with our bodies, but do we listen to our body? I’m currently doing Somatic Experiencing therapy, and then I’ve got my regular therapist. What Somatic therapy has taught me is to not push through when your body tells you to stop. And that’s what we’re all so good at as dancers – like we sprained an ankle, oh, well. I got another ankle, let’s just keep it moving. Now I’m learning how to feel my feelings. And I know that sounds real basic, but it is basic. And that’s okay. I would rather feel my feelings than not, because I know people that keep their feelings inside. I grew up with an Asian mother, who taught me that vulnerability equaled weakness. It’s not courageous. And it has been definitely an eye opener and scary as shit. It’s been really scary for me to be vulnerable, and to figure out, what does that mean? What does that look like for Cheryl? And trying not to set expectations that are too high, trying not to judge my feelings.

But back to what you were saying about body language. I believe that there’s so many different types of therapy out there – you don’t need to just do talk therapy. You don’t have to sit there in front of a stranger and talk – I understand that some people can’t. A family member of mine, who also got sexually molested by the same man, cannot talk about it. I think there’s animals, there’s movement, and I’m creating a dance program, hopefully launching this year, called Body Language. It combines movement and mental health, which is a real thing that works. I only know from experience, which is why I have a partner who’s a certified therapist that can back it up with science.

Carrie Ann: You know, it’s so true. My first experience of dance was when I was four years old. We ran around in an open air pavilion in Hawaii, and it wasn’t labeled as dance, it was more just expression. Everyone has to move. When you look into the science of it, energy has to move, and our bodies need to express ourselves. I worked with an organization a while ago called Drea’s Dream, and it’s for pediatric cancer movement therapy. It’s really powerful because our body never lies, right? And I think, as a judge, whenever I’m watching, I can learn so much about a person. It informs the critiques that I give to people, because it doesn’t lie. I can tell when somebody’s really tense, I can tell when somebody’s really scared. That’s why I’m always encouraging people to shake it off or to push it far enough that they fall. Once you get past that point, it’s so much easier. Is that a part of the new program that you’re starting with somatic movement?

Cheryl Burke: Yeah, I eventually want all different types or styles of dance. But obviously, I’m an expert in ballroom and I know from firsthand experience that it helped me from when I was sexually abused, to when I was dating abusive men. At the end of the day, the reason why I’m sitting here with you now is because of movement. I cannot discredit that. What I’ve learned so far from Dr. Peter Levine, who started this whole somatic intelligence talk, is that movement helps you shake off trauma. Dr. Levine went to Africa, and long story short, studied the animals and how they shake things off. As it turns out, when they shake it off, they’re actually shaking off trauma so that they don’t continue to keep PTSD in their body. So, Body Language is not going to be about choreography or exercise. It’s literally just bringing out the character of each dance. So we go back and relive that trauma, then we shake it off. And we are intentional about what it is that we want to shake off. For example, if we got into a car accident, and were able to get out of the car and literally shake it off, we would never have to experience the PTSD that most people have experienced. And are still experiencing, myself included.

Carrie Ann: Right, because the muscles contract. I’ve done a little work on this, because I’ve had extreme pain from trauma. When we have traumatic experiences, our body tenses, and then if we don’t release the tension, those neural pathways grow tight. If we start to experience anything similar, or in the range of something similar, we will have the same reaction. So your body will overreact, and that’s the PTSD that you’re talking about. But when you shake it off, you don’t allow those pathways to harden. I think this is going to be so great, it’s going to help a lot of people. People don’t necessarily have to understand with their mind what’s happening. This is another entryway for people who don’t want to talk, right? They don’t want to do talk therapy, they don’t want to use their mind. They just want to absorb it and heal.

(Laughing) They’re not like you and I, who are going to read 97,000 books.

Cheryl Burke: And overanalyze it all and take notes.

Who else is excited to try Cheryl’s somatic movement Therapy class when it’s available? She has come up with such a fun, creative concept that opens the door to new healing modalities. The journey to wellness isn’t one size fits all, and that is why we like to highlight many approaches here at CAC. Healing is personal, and sometimes traditional methods may not work for you. Maybe movement therapy is just the thing you’ve been missing! Let us know what you think in the comments, and if anything in particular from this conversation resonated with you.

To watch Carrie Ann’s full interview with Cheryl, click here.

For more information on Cheryl and her loungewear line, follow the links below:

Instagram: @cherylburke

Twitter: @CherylBurke

Cheryl’s Website

Cheryl’s YouTube channel

Cheryl’s favorite hobby – diamond painting!

Her loungewear collection with Bailey Blue

Cheryl’s book